Thursday, May 30, 2013

There are few things more humbling than getting naked in a public change room....

There are few things more humbling than getting naked in a public change room..... hey, here`s one of those things.....
We like to take our whole herd of kiddlings to the YMCA on Friday nights. (Well `like` is a strong word, we have determined to take them each week might better describe our intention) As much as we`d love to have an out-of-this-world adventure with our little ones each time we pile into two separate vehicles to go anywhere fun, outings like this are never what you imagine them to be and fun isn`t really the word I would choose to label it. Before we even leave the house the tension level is high....and climbing.
"Do you have your bathing suits and towels? Leave your brother alone! Did you remember your swipy card thingy? Don't forget a hair brush girls, oh and  pony tails to pull your hair back. Did you get The Baby's towel while you were getting yours? Stop hitting your brother! Do you boys have deodorant in your gym bags? Clean underwear! Don't forget clean underwear! I said STOP hitting your brother! Where's your father anyway? Why do you still have wet clothes in your bag from last week? Nicholas! Remember to bring your ear plugs honey. Oh dear Lord, did I forget to shave again!?! If I have to tell you to leave your brother alone again you're not coming! Don't forget your locks, let's go, Dad is waiting in the driveway. Does everyone have their gym bags? Are we ready? lets go!"
{Divide seven children and all their gym bags & swim gear up between two vehicles. The boys ride with Dad in the Jeep of course....way cooler than the mini van}
The lady behind the desk at the YMCA pasted on her best "Welcome to the Y" smile as she saw the herd approaching....but you could see the fear in her eyes. "I get to swipe my card first!" whines one,  No I do!" shouts another. "Mine doesn't work!" cries a boy...or is that a girl? "Turn it around" corrects Dad. "No fair! He swiped his card two times, I only got to do it once, I want to do it again!" says the short blonde haired boy. "Give. me. those . cards,  I'll  . do  .  it!"  I hiss through gritted teeth. "Whose bright idea was this anyway?" I think to myself as I swipe each child's membership card through the card reader.
The kind lady behind the desk continues to smile (perhaps it's a grimace) as we gather the children and head toward the change rooms. Dad takes the boys and Mom takes the girls, although they have a "family change room" we couldn't handle it...... someone would get hurt.
"Okay hon, I'll see you in the pool in a while, you can handle the kids can't you? I want to get my work out in first" I add quickly as I disappear through the doorway into the ladies locker room.  Once the girls are changed into their swim suits and showered I usher them toward the swimming pool to find Dad and make a hasty retreat to the gym. "Ahhhh, peace and quiet." Well if you consider a couple dozen sweaty, grunting people huffing and puffing their way through their personal workout programs solitude.... I do. I no longer have the energy to chase my wild 4 year old through the house when she's on a terrorist mission but I can kick butt on the elliptical for 30 minutes with a smile on my face.
And before you know it my work out is done and I have to wander back to the swimming pool area to join my Husband and children. What's this? The kiddlings are toweling off and heading to the change rooms. "Oh dear, that workout took a little longer than I expected." I coyly whined to my husband, "I'm sorry I couldn't join you guys....did you have fun swimming?" The "are you kidding me" look he shot back spoke volumes. "Come on girls, let's go shower and change" I said brightly as I redirected the girls to the locker room.
The Teenager, Little Susan and Latoya can take care of themselves in the change room. The Baby on the other hand requires hands-on supervision at all times to restrain her from climbing under bathroom stall doors or bursting through plastic shower curtains scaring unsuspecting ladies in mid-shower. So into the shower we go. Together. She is mildly entertained by the water rushing down the drain and the shampoo bubbles splattering on the floor. When she looks up and takes a step back with a wide grin on her face I know I'm in for some pre schooler scrutiny. "I see your bum." she says matter of factly. "It looks funny." "Thanks Baby," I reply "I grew it myself." She laughs at me as she inches closer with the loofa sponge. "I'm gonna wash you" she says with a smile. "No thanks hon, I got this" I inform her as I grab the loofa and put shampoo in her hair.... that will keep her busy. Minutes later in the locker room we are drying off and trying to wiggle our still damp bodies into our clothes when I notice Latoya watching me dress with an odd expression on her face. I turned my back to her and continued to manipulate myself into my clothes. I was having difficulty with my bra when I noticed her staring again. "Latoya, don't stare, it's rude!" I chastened. "Mama, can I ask you something?" she said in a somewhat embarrassed but awe filled voice. "Sure honey, what is it?" I casually replied, still fussing with my undergarment. "Are they supposed to do that? she said in wonder.
I readjusted myself and looked at her and realized she was staring in horror at my bra."Are what supposed to do what?" I inquired. Cautiously she said "Are they supposed to fold back up like that when you put your bra on?
Well..... what can you say to that?

~Here's a Few Funnies From our House to ours~

Shane approached me in the kitchen and said "Mom, my glasses feel really soft (light." "What do you mean Buddy?" I replied. "I can't even feel them on." he said excitedly. "You don't have them on....." I informed him. "Oh." he said as he reached up to feel for them and noticed they weren't there.

The Baby announced loudly "I got cheese in my butt and I'm gonna fart!" Little Susan clarified it for the onlookers by explaining that the Baby had too much cheese the night before.

The Baby was laying in her bed looking at books during "quiet time" (her alternative to nap time). Suddenly I heard her belting out "I'm sexy and I know it...." in her loudest singing voice. {Where do they come up with this stuff?!?}

~Subscribers Stories~
Do you have a funny or cute story to share? Want to have it included in our Subscribers Stories section of our Fish Bowl? Just email me your story and I'll have it included in a future edition of The Fish Bowl. Please include your name and email address with all submissions.

Too funny.... The doctor just told gabby she wanted to check her nerve so gabby says "what's a nerve? Is that the thing inside you that gets you angry?"
I think she has heard me say you are getting on my nerves a few to many times.
Submitted by Veronica A from Windsor

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Lovin' the sunshine today, be blessed!

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