Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Have you ever wondered what insanity looks like ….
I should have had a video camera going. Looking back on that night I really wish I had…. Well kind of…
It would have been funnier if it happened to some other family and I could sit back and hear all about it or watch it play out on the big screen with a diet Pepsi in one hand a bowl of smart food popcorn in the other – but as circumstances would have it …. It happened to us….. and it WASN’T FUNNY at the time.
The younger kiddlings were fast asleep in their beds; they had been down for a little while. My Husband and the Teenager were sitting by the fire downstairs in the family room, watching something on television. I was enjoying some quiet solitude in the living room. A rare opportunity to have some “Me time” and catch up on things I needed to do on the computer. Replying to an email, I had just clicked “send” when I heard a noise. “Shhhoooop!” It sounded like the noise of the bedroom door opening so I watched in that direction with anticipation. “One of my little girlies must be out of bed” I thought to myself. I stared at the door but it didn’t open. “That’s odd” I thought “that sounded exactly like their door opening.” I shrugged my shoulders and turned my attention back to my computer ….. Then I caught something out of the corner of my eye. It was a quick movement – so I almost missed it….but there was no mistaking the flapping sound of wings rushing past my head at an incredible speed. I quickly ducked and froze. “Is that a bird???” my mind asked immediately. But I knew from the chill in my spine and the scream caught in my throat that it was NOT a bird…. It was a BAT. His long leathery wings flapping furiously, flying in circles from the living room to the dining room and back again. Narrowly missing my head each time! I couldn’t contain myself any longer and let out a blood curling scream “AAAAHHHHH!!!!!! Husband! Husband! AAAHHHH!!!! Husband!!!!” I didn’t have the opportunity to run from the room – or I would have. I happened to be right in this winged creature’s path and couldn’t get out of the way. I scrambled down off my chair and crawled under the computer desk … well, as far in as I could (whose idea was it to put the printer under here anyway?) I reached up and blindly grabbed my desk calendar and put it over my head – to protect myself??? Hahahaha. I screamed for my husband again and heard him racing up the stairs. “What’s wrong?!” He hollered, voice full of concern. “Where are you? What’s wrooooOOO!!” OH MY GOSH!!” CRASH!!! Down he went. Right the floor. Eyes wide in fear and amazement. He lay on his back and yelled for the Teenager. “Bring me a towel or a blanket!” No answer. “Teenager! Bring me a towel or blanket – QUICK!” he pleaded again (lying on the kitchen floor on his back slowly sliding himself backward by dragging his body along the floor) screaming “Aahh!! Aahh!!” every time the flapping bat circled over top of him. “Get him! Get Him!” I screamed, like a mad woman from under the computer desk. “Where are YOU?” my Husband inquired. “I’m under the desk” I shot back “don’t leave me here! Where are you going?” I screamed….hysteria rising up within me. Flap, flap, flap, swoop. “I have to go get a blanket to catch this thing.” He reasoned. “Don’t you leave me here alone ….. Unless you want to be divorced!” I whimpered back. “Teenager!” He yelled “Hurry up!” “I’m locked in the bathroom and I am NOT coming out!” she squealed back. I could hear my Husband sliding across the kitchen floor on his back – he must have made it to the basement stairs cause I heard him scrambling to get up and then his footsteps fading away as he ran down the stairs. I was alone with the flying creature. Flap, flap, flap, swoop. Flap, flap, flap, swoop. Around and around. I was listening so intently to the wings flapping to determine where the bat was that I didn’t hear my Husband creep back up into the kitchen.
That night I dreamt of bats hiding in my bed sheets and in the closets…it was a fitful sleepless night to say the least. I got up in the middle of the night to use the washroom and sat there praying the whole time that no flying winged creature would swoop down on my head. The next morning we told the other kiddlings about our adventure and showed them a few pictures (yes, even in times like this I still find a moment to grab my camera and catch some drama) The boys opened the back door to check out the empty hamster cage on the back porch (where in the world did he go???) and then Shane got seriously quiet and said to me “Mom, why were you so scared? Weren’t you a wildlife rehabilitator before? You’ve taken care of bats before haven’t you?” Red-faced and embarrassed I tried to explain myself “Son, the bats I rehabilitated were orphaned or injured and could not fly around and swoop down at me – they were hurt and I helped them … This bat didn’t need my help … besides, I haven’t had rabies shots in a very long time now” :)
As I sat in the bathroom with the Baby, waiting for her to “go potty” I noticed a large tear in the screen in at the top of the bathroom window. After a shower or bath I often open the window to clear up the steam. I remembered doing that a couple nights ago after the little girlies had their baths. I opened the window and forgot about it – I shut it again just before bedtime. It was late the next night that we had the “Bat Incident.” The only place the bat could have hidden out and not been noticed for a day and a half was on the dark shower curtains …. Sooooo …… are you squirming yet???? That means that my Husband (in the morning) and my Teenager (in the evening) both had the pleasure of showering with the nasty home invader…..Hahahahahaha. Can you imagine what would have happened if the bat decided to “make an appearance” in the shower? Although we just got new windows installed with brand new screens, we all check the shower curtains now before we hop into the shower…. Just incase.
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Posted by Lucy at 9:41 AM